Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
