Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
please come you make the beer taste better
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
