it hurts more in the daytime
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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