with your own penis?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I understand Curling. That high.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Randomize
