remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
should my penis look like a turkey
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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