You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
