I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
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