my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Randomize
