I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
