Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I just pynch a tree in the face
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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