Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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