doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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