I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize