Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Randomize
