I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize