I wish i was in the wii world.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
