Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
