love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize
