that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
