After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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