i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
don't judge my taste in strippers
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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