You work out of a Hotel?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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