Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize
