You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
