I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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