Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
