maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
