Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize
