I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
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