Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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