This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
