is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
