Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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