i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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