i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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