I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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