she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
