there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
