5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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