Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Even my vagina gasped.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
