Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Randomize