went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
