Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
