and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
