Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
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