Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
