Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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