we're chasing vodka with high fives
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize