Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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