There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize